Hey there weekday warriors,

Today we’re deep-diving into Apple’s WWDC, breaking down Nvidia’s latest W & a whole lot more.

Enjoy the next 4 minutes and 14 seconds of blue-chip news and commentary.

Keep on snapping necks and cashing checks,

- tyler

+ US stocks “closed higher on Monday — with the S&P 500 and Nasdaq both notching fresh records — as investors braced for a Federal Reserve policy decision and key inflation data in the week ahead.” (Yahoo! Finance)

+ The 10-year Treasury yield was “higher on Monday as investors looked ahead to the Federal Reserve’s monetary policy meeting and key inflation data due this week." (CNBC)

+ Oil “climbed about 3% to a one-week high on Monday, buoyed by hopes of rising fuel demand this summer despite a stronger U.S. dollar and expectations the U.S. Federal Reserve will leave interest rates higher for longer.” (Reuters)

+ Bitcoin “stayed nearly flat on Monday after a sharp fall over the weekend saw the cryptocurrency pull back from recent highs, with focus squarely on more key signals on U.S. interest rates.” (Investing.com)

+ The three most talked about stocks on WallStreetBets in the past 24 hours were: 1) Nvidia +0.7% 2) C3.ai +4.5% 3) Apple -1.9%

The market moves you need to know about…

– Look on the bright side, GME investors, it could be worse, you could be down another 40%. Shares of GameStop couldn’t stop the bleeding from Friday, falling another 12.0% on the day.

+ The Apple effect is real. Vimeo shares jumped 5.2%… simply because it was mentioned during the Apple Worldwide Developer Conference event.

– Trump Media fell 5.6% on news that it had re-filed its latest financials after its last auditor was accused of “massive fraud.”

Worldwide Disappointment Conference

Apple was one U2 album shy of its most epic failure to date…

Yesterday’s Worldwide Developer Conference showcased Apple’s (-1.9%) AI ambitions. Just one problem: they weren’t particularly ambitious.

First, the good…

• Some of the iOS updates were kinda cool. Like customization for the home screen (read: what Android has been doing for a decade). Plus, a handful of updates to messages (like send later) and tap to cash (which makes sending cash kinda like trading Pokémon on Game Boy) were cool… I guess.

• The Notes and calculator apps on the iPad almost make an iPad worth getting (… almost). In the calculator app, you can use an Apple Pencil to write equations that your iPad will solve.

• “Genmoji” will allow users to create their own AI emojis… and what could possibly go wrong?

And that was kinda it.

Now for the bad…

The only thing more underwhelming than Apple’s AI debut was the name of its product line (read: Apple Intelligence)…

• Writing improvements and image generation, which at this point in the AI hype cycle is Day 1 stuff.

• Cross-application tasks will allow you to recall or search for something in, say, Notes, while they’re in Uber Eats. Because God forbid you need to navigate to another app.

• Sure, Siri improved marginally. Now you can text her instead of having to speak. And if you do decide to go the spoken word route, she can better handle natural language (think: stumbles and “umms”). But this all feels really… underwhelming.

And, the ugly…

Probably the most jarring announcement was the one that investors feared the most. ChatGPT will be mainlined directly into the Apple ecosystem by way of Siri. Instead of being limited to Siri’s vast library of knowledge (read: Google), Siri will give you the option to tap into ChatGPT (for free… so we’ve got that going for us).

The announcement caught the attention of Elon Musk, who called out the potential privacy concerns (read: OpenAI will have free rein over Apple user data). He’s probably not wrong…

He went so far as to say he’d consider banning all Apple products from his companies.

+ You’re not going to believe this, but… Nvidia shareholders BTFS (bought the f*cking split)…

Nvidia (+0.7%) started trading on its 10-for-1 split basis on Monday. That means it opened at $120.88 vs. $1,208.88… because, math.

In theory, the split means nothing for the fundamentals of the stock. But recently we’ve seen big techs get a boost from the decision to create more shares. Some would argue that the lower price makes the shares more accessible to retail investors, but those people are idiots (see: fractional investing).

Also, while I’m throwing shade, don’t think I didn’t cringe every time I saw a tweet about Nvidia’s shares being “down 90%!”

+ Today in ‘investing in things you know nothing about’… Paul Singer took a huge stake in a discount airline.

The billionaire’s Elliott Management has built a $1.9B stake in Southwest Airlines (+7.0%). And they’re out for blood. The first order of business? Fire CEO Bob Jordan and Chairman Gary Kelly.

But that’s not all. They’ve got some other ideas on how the airline can play catchup. Hiking bag fees seems like a good place to start.

And maybe Elliott is onto something. Shares of S-Dub are down 50% over the past three years, while most of its competitors are up at least marginally over the same period.

+ “We are not Ticketmaster.” - how StubHub is positioning its IPO, probably

Bloomberg reported yesterday that StubHub is planning to take its talents public as soon as next month. And we finally got a glimpse under the hood. Turns out that re-selling overpriced tickets is incredibly lucrative…

The company posted $305M in EBITDA on $1.4B in revenue for the year ended in March.

+ What you’ll pay in every U.S. state in hidden homeownership costs: It’s like ‘buying a used car every year’ (Read)

+ 35-year-old making $11,400 a week in passive income: The 3 questions I asked myself before quitting my day job (Read)

⏪ Yesterday, we were keeping an eye on Apple’s WWDC. You can scroll up for a full recap.

⏩ Here's what we’re keeping an eye on today...

+ Oracle reports after the bell

+ The FOMC meeting gets underway (more to come tomorrow)

Yesterday, I asked, “Do you think Apple announces some "game-changing" AI innovation or product at its WWDC?”

78.1% of you were right (Apple wouldn’t announce anything particularly game-changing)…

My favorite note was: “They’ll do something that has already been done, but say it louder.” Absolutely spot on.

Here’s today’s question…

(Let’s assume they both retired today…)

Before you go…

‘We CARe aBOuT yOUr PrIVaCy!” - Tim Cook

Does this look like the face of a guy you should take financial advice from?

No, it’s the face of an individual who is financially irresponsible/dumb enough to be talked into spending money on a family photo shoot that he could have just done with his iPhone. So, act accordingly...

This is not financial advice. Nothing in this newsletter is an investment recommendation. All content is created for entertainment, educational, or informational purposes only. Do your own research, or do yourself a favor and hire a professional.