Hey there weekday warriors,

OpenAI is really, really good at LLMs. And really, really bad at making a profit. Plus, let’s pour one out for inflation.

Enjoy the next 4 minutes and 34 seconds of blue-chip news and commentary.

Keep on snapping necks and cashing checks,

– tyler

+ US stocks “drifted higher over the past week, with the S&P 500 notching several record closes as investors digested more signs of cooling inflation amid resilient economic growth data.” (Yahoo! Finance)

+ The 10-year Treasury yield “dipped on Friday after the release of key inflation data that showed the rate of price increases is close to the Federal Reserve’s target.” (CNBC)

+ Oil “settled higher on Friday but fell on the week as investors weighed expectations for higher global supply against fresh stimulus from top crude importer China.” (Reuters)

+ Bitcoin rose over the weekend. It certainly didn’t hurt that CZ Binance was released from prison on Friday.

+ The three most talked about stocks on WallStreetBets in the past 24 hours were: 1) Nvidia -2.1% 2) C3.ai -0.6% 3) Rocket Lab +12.4%

The market moves you need to know about…

+ Define ‘bleak.’ Scripps News said it’s laying off 200 employees. The rationale? “Amidst an already difficult linear television advertising marketplace, many brands and agencies have decided that advertising around national news is just too risky for them given the polarized nature of this country, no matter the accolades and credentials a news organization like Scripps receives for its objectivity.” Shares jumped 23.6%.

+ The future is now. Rocket Lab soared 12.4% on news that Key Banc boosted its target on the space launch provider. They’re bullish after Rocket Lab completed testing for a second launch with Varda Space Industries, which is manufacturing pharmaceuticals in space. You read that right…

ChatEBIT

It appears that Sam Altman will not be tying his equity compensation to profitability metrics…

The most important company in the history of the world is about to raise money. Which means there’s a pitch deck floating. And some butt hurt investor(s) who got left out of the round were more than happy to breach their NDA and share it with the world.

We got a look at OpenAI’s finances. And it’s an income statement only a mother could love. For the year of our lord 2024, OpenAI expects $3.7B in revenue… and $5B in losses.

Turns out, all those dorks it’s hiring to take over the world aren’t cheap. Nor are all those Nvidia chips.

On the bright side, Sam Altman and OpenAI expect sales to more than triple next year to $11.6B. And it’s starting to make a whole lot more sense why Sam wants to get his equity grant now…

Next round

ICYMI, OpenAI is planning to raise $6.5B at a $150B valuation. Thrive Capital is leading the round. Microsoft and Nvidia are also expected to join. Because, obviously.

There’s one notable name that won’t be on the cap table, however. Apple reportedly walked away from talks to invest in OpenAI. And I, for one, cannot wait to see this CNBC headline in 2037: ‘Here’s how much money Apple would have if it invested in OpenAI in 2024.’

Let’s role-play for a minute…

On Friday, I asked, “What’s the ultimate dad clothing brand?” 32.5% of you think Tommy Bahama. Next up was Costco. Followed by Under Armour.

+ “Ladies and gentlemen, we got him.”

They’re going to build statues of Jerome Powell when it’s all said and done, you guys. J-Poww and the Fed are this close to putting inflation in a body bag. In August, the personal consumption expenditures (PCE) price index rose just 0.1% month over month and 2.2% year over year. Friendly reminder: the Central Bank’s inflation target is 2%.

The inflation data came in below the Street’s predictions, meaning it’s closing in on the Fed’s mandate even quicker than expected.

Meanwhile, on the core PCE front…

Excluding food and energy, prices rose 0.1% in August and 2.7% year over year. That was in line with expectations.

+ Weight Watchers is trimming the fat…

WW (-2.1%) CEO Sima Sistani stepped down abruptly on Friday. Read: she was allowed to resign. Tara Comente, a current WW board member and the former President of Shake Shack, will take over on an interim basis.

Sistani’s stint as CEO lasted about as long as a dozen Krispy Kreme’s at a Weight Watchers meeting. This isn’t all that surprising, given shares have lost 90% this year alone.

During her tenure, the company bought Sequence, which slings GLP-1 weight loss drugs, and saw Oprah leave its board.

+ Beijing just went all, ‘bro, can you not?’

The Chinese government offered “strong guidance” (read: we’ll send your family to the gulag if you don’t listen) to its domestic tech players to stop using US chips. It stopped short of an outright ban.

The CCP hopes to boost its in-house semi production and take the sting off of the US’ chip export bans.

Nvidia fell 2.1% on the day.

+ It appears that AI in California is going to be a lot like SF… an absolute clusterf*ck.

Governator Gavin Newsom vetoed an artificial intelligence bill that would have protected the public from AI eliminating the human race becoming uncontrollable. Newsom argued that stifling the tech would just force companies out of the state. He’s not wrong…

+ The No. 1 misconception most people have about feeling rich—and how to combat it. Turns out it actually does buy happiness…

+ NYC rent continues to rise: Here’s how much you need to earn to leave in each borough. You have to be dating Jeff Bezos to even look at real estate in Cobble Hill.

+ The 'most volatile ETF to ever hit Wall Street' launched in August - it's already been dethroned. What a time to be alive...

🔥 This 50-year-old concept is still the best way to make yourself productive, says expert: 3 simple ways to master it. Had no idea Adderall has been around that long.

🔥 People who are good at small talk do these 3 things and ‘reap the rewards.’

FYI, TWC might be compensated if you click on the links above. So, what are you waiting for? Start clicking.

⏪ On Friday, August core PCE (inflation) data dropped

⏩ Today we’re keeping an eye on…

+ Carnival Cruise Lines reports before the bell

+ J-Poww gives a speech at 1 PM

+ A strike is set to start at ports up and down the East Coast if the International Longshoremen's Association union fails to ink a new contract

Friday, I asked, “What’s the best national wing chain?”

Just an absolutely dominant performance from the GOAT…

1. Buffalo Wild Wings (by a mile)

2. Wingstop

3. Hooters

Here’s what some of you guys had to say (and my thoughts in italics)…

• Zaxby's: "Zaxby’s was the best part of going to college in NC. God I miss Zax sauce…"

• Write in: "The greatest trick Buffalo ever pulled was convincing Americans that a trash part of a chicken was edible." Thank you for this fun fact... NOW ANSWER THE QUESTION.

• Twin Peaks: "Smoked and extra grilled are a life changer. They are so good that even my wife will go there." This is the highest honor ever bestowed on Twin Peaks.

• B-Dubs: "former undisputed #1 is now ripe for a coup... but still hard to beat the mango habanero"

And here’s today’s questions…

Here are some of the ground rules for this one…

• You start with whatever amount of money you had 10 years ago - so you can’t say “Dude, I’d invest $1B in AAPL stock,” if you didn’t actually have $1B

• You can’t just say “I’d invent ChatGPT and become a trillionaire,” unless you’re Sam Altman (and if you are, I’d love for you to sponsor TWC… hit me up)

• Let’s assume you know everything, but your life goes back to exactly the way it was 10 years ago (same job, # of kids, spouse, etc.)

+ This one is for the parents out there…

🔥 Pretty cool guide to how 30 brand logos evolved over the years

Oh, and one more thing…

Does this look like the face of a guy you should take financial advice from?

No, it’s the face of an individual who is financially irresponsible/dumb enough to be talked into spending money on a family photo shoot that he could have just done with his iPhone. So, act accordingly...

This is not financial advice. Nothing in this newsletter is an investment recommendation. All content is created for entertainment, educational, or informational purposes only. Do your own research, or do yourself a favor and hire a professional.