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Hey there weekday warrior,

Elon vs. Zuck is out. Elon vs. pretty much every other billionaire (including POTUS) is in.

Enjoy the next 4 minutes and 14 seconds of blue-chip news and commentary.

Keep on snapping necks and cashing checks,

– tyler

PS, LAST CHANCE. Don’t say I didn’t warn you.

I teamed up with a few of my favorite newsletters to give away a 4-night cruise to the Bahamas for 2 (presumably me + you).

It's pretty simple...

1. Head to the giveaway website

2. Enter to win

3. Patiently wait (...while I rig the giveaway for a TWC reader)

The contest ends TODAY.

So what are you waiting for? Enter right now.

Elon vs. Everybody

Shots fired Clip unloaded.

Late Tuesday night, Elon went scorched Earth on the global elite. He’ll almost certainly be hearing from Illuminati management.

Elon called a handful of his fellow one-percenters poor.

On Tuesday, the new President announced a $500B AI investment in the US, funded by the private sector. Oracle, OpenAI, and Softbank (and some other partners) led the charge. Donald Trump was joined at the White House by Larry Ellison, Sam Altman, and Masa Son to announce Project Stargate.

But Elon thinks that the CEOs and their respective organizations have written checks that their a** can’t cash. According to Elon, he “has on good authority” (which I’m pretty sure is legally binding) that Masa Son has only secured $10B for AI investment. The rest is presumably tied up in Adam Neumann’s next project.

He was a little more blunt about OpenAI’s ability (or lack thereof) to get its trickle-down economics on. Friendly reminder: he hates Sam Altman more than the dude who cost him $56B.

What do you have to say for yourselves?

Sam Altman clapped back: “wrong, as you surely know.”

And Satya Nadella, the CEO of Microsoft, who’s listed as one of OpenAI’s tech partners in Stargate (read: sugar daddy) said “Look, all I know is, I’m good for my $80 billion.” And you can stop searching folks, we just found the most “Kendall Roy” quote ever.

What’s at stake?

The $500B is expected to create more than 100k jobs in the US, help build out necessary infrastructure, and fund AI research. More importantly, the investment will extend America’s lead in the AI game, the winner of which could very well decide the fate of human civilization. No pressure.

Of course, in the short term, this could make things awkward in the West Wing (where Elon is apparently not getting an office). Elon is more or less calling bullsh*t on a plan endorsed by his BFF, President Donald Trump... probably because he’s butthurt the White House is cozying up to his mortal enemy (Sam Altman). Huge L for everyone who took the over on Elon and Trump beefing before the President completes his first 100 days in office.

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+ Apple (+0.5%) is on the ropes, and Samsung wants to go all Mortal Kombat.

The new Galaxy lineup just dropped, with the Samsung Galaxy S25 series in preorder mode, set for release on February 7. The latest Android is all about one thing, and it’s exactly what you think (spoiler: AI). Samsung’s Galaxy AI can perform tasks across different apps… so stuff Apple won’t be doing until 2045.

Apple has been down horrendous after reports of slow sales for the iPhone 16 and Apple Intelligence, despite jamming this weird ad (which is giving major Folgers ‘Home for the Holidays’ ad vibes) down our throats. Plus, Apple Intelligence has taken some heat for its hot takes (read: reporting totally wrong information from news headlines.)

Not to mention, Apple just ate a jab-cross combo after yesterday’s announcement from Meta (+1.1%) that it’s closing the gap on wearables.

+ Salesforce (+1.7%) CEO Marc Benioff went all “my AI could beat up your AI,” and slammed Microsoft’s (+4.1%) Copilot at the Davos World Economic Forum, which is that thing that billionaires go to if they can’t afford to attend the Trump inauguration.

The CRM Chief called Copilot a disappointment, “a repackaged ChatGPT,” and where’s the lie? In Marc’s defense, Microsoft CEO Satya Nadella started the beef on a VC podcast, predicting business applications like Salesforce’s Agentforce would “all collapse.” Tough talk from the guy responsible for every Teams meeting that should’ve been an email.

+ Anthropic just cucked its biggest investor. Friendly reminder: Amazon has already invested $8B in the OpenAI competitor…

Google (+0.1%) wants in on the action (again). And the maker of Claude happily accepted the check. They’ve agreed to set fire to invest another $1B in Anthropic’s latest funding round (reminder: Google was already in for $2B and 10% ownership).

+ Live look at EA shares…

Electronic Arts (-0.6% // after hours -11.5%) went all USMNT-in-literally-any-major-match after lowering its full-year guidance from $2.5B to $2.2B. EA blamed weak sales of its soccer game EA Sports FC (friendly reminder: it lost the rights to the FIFA name in 2022, which might explain some of the slowdown).

Of course, Dragon Age’s piss poor performance didn’t help either. The RPG underperformed expectations by almost 50%. EA is scheduled to drop Q3 earnings on February 4. Godspeed.

+ How Much Is Your College Football Team Worth? LOL Rutgers.

+ Is Real Estate Still a Good Investment in 2025? Spoiler: no.

🔥 Stop being a ‘Boomerasker’. Oh, and never say ‘boomerasker’ in public, or you’ll probably get stuffed in a locker.

FYI, TWC might be compensated if you click on the links above. So, what are you waiting for? Start clicking.

+ US stocks: “Tech stocks led the market on Wednesday as Netflix (NFLX) stock surged to a record, while President Donald Trump's boost to AI demand hopes outweighed fresh tariff worries.” (Yahoo! Finance)

+ The 10-year yield “[was] slightly higher Wednesday as investors awaited more economic data and digested U.S. President Donald Trump’s latest comments.” (CNBC)

+ Oil “prices eased to a fresh one-week low on Wednesday as the market considers how U.S. President Donald Trump's proposed tariffs could affect global economic growth and demand for energy.” (Reuters)

+ Bitcoin “saw little price change on Wednesday, steadying following an earlier rally after the Securities and Exchange Commission (SEC), under President Donald Trump, said it was preparing a new regulatory framework for crypto.” (Investing.com)

+ The three most talked about stocks on WallStreetBets in the past 24 hours were: 1) Nvidia +4.4% 2) C3.ai +2.5% 3) Netflix +9.6%

⏪ Yesterday, J&J, P&G, GE Vernova, and Ally reported before the bell, and Discover Financial released earnings after hours.

⏩ Today we’re keeping an eye on…

+ GE Aerospace, Union Pacific, and American Airlines report before the bell

+ Texas Instruments drops earnings this evening

+ Costco’s annual meeting… gets 5 big booms

Yesterday, I asked, “You get $1 million straight cash, but you need to watch a video (probably feature-length film) of all the negative things ANYONE has ever said about you. You taking that deal?”

89.4% of you are taking the money. And I think you severely underestimate how many people talk sh*t about you. I'd have to think long and hard about this one (then I'd take the money).

• Yes: "Literally Lloyd and Harry drying their tears with fresh bills”

• Yes: “Sticks and stones, Motherf*cker...pay me! lol”

• Yes: "Getting money and an excuse to cut some friends? 2 birds 1 stone, baby”

• Yes: “My crippling anxiety does this for me every night. Why not get paid for it?” They make pills (and nasal spray) for that.

• Yes: “I think it's cute that you think anyone's reel would be as short as a feature-length film. We're talking "Limited Series" length for most.”

• Yes: “I love a good roast.”

And here’s today’s question…

+ No post has ever summed up corporate America better

Oh, and one more thing…

Does this look like the face of a guy you should take financial advice from?

No, it’s the face of an individual who is financially irresponsible/dumb enough to be talked into spending money on a family photo shoot that he could have just done with his iPhone. So, act accordingly...

This is not financial advice. Nothing in this newsletter is an investment recommendation. All content is created for entertainment, educational, or informational purposes only. Do your own research, or do yourself a favor and hire a professional.