💦 NYCBleak

And new inflation data

Hey there weekday warriors,

I have some bad news. Shaq is not seeking re-election to Papa John’s board. What a time to be alive…

Here’s what else we’re getting into today…

  • NYCB tumbles

  • New inflation data

  • Dell is so back

Enjoy the next 4 minutes and 24 seconds of blue-chip news and commentary.

Keep on snapping necks and cashing checks,

+ US stocks “rallied to close out the best February for the S&P 500 and Nasdaq Composite in nearly a decade as investors digested a crucial inflation reading.” (Yahoo! Finance)

+ The 10-year Treasury yield “finished February with its largest monthly advance since the fourth quarter of last year after a stream of U.S. data pointed to persistent inflation." (MarketWatch)

+ Oil prices “edged lower on Thursday as U.S. inflation data implied a softening of the world's biggest economy that could weaken crude demand, with rising OPEC production also weighing on prices.” (Reuters)

+ Bitcoin’s “stood roughly 9% off its all-time high after a swift rally in the cryptocurrency.” (WSJ)

+ The three most talked about stocks on WallStreetBets in the past 24 hours were: 1) Marathon Digital -16.5% 2) SoundHound AI +17.0% AH: -21.4% 3) C3.ai +24.5%

The market moves you need to know about…

+ Shocker… shares of the company with AI in its name jumped 24.5% after it announced earnings. C3.ai gave investors a beat and a raise.

 It’ll be interesting to see how Elon dances on Fisker’s grave. Luckily, we probably won’t have to wait that long. Shares plummeted 37.2% on news that the company has “going concern doubts” which are the only three words investors hate more than “Robinhood halts trading.”

+ Do you guys remember that time Kodak said it was pivoting to generic drug manufacturing? Shares mooned… and it all blew up spectacularly. Well, yesterday wasn’t worthy of a Netflix docuseries, but shares did jump 52.5%. This time it had to do with Kodak’s plans to tap into its $1.2B pension surplus to pay down debts and/or make company-owned investments. For anyone under 50, I’ll save you the trouble of Googling “what is a pension?” Here’s the Investopedia link.

Life comes at you fast

(Source: Giphy)

Remember NYCB (-21.7% after hours)? You know, the bank that was dubbed the next SVB. Well, it’s back on its bullsh*t. Or maybe it never stopped being on its bullsh*t?

In its defense, NYCB isn’t having the same issues as SVB or First Republic (or Lehman, for those wondering). But it’s still a dumpster fire.

And its commercial real estate exposure is to blame. Well, that, and its internal control weaknesses…

Yesterday, the company announced an amendment to its Q4 earnings. Spoiler: it wasn’t the good kind.

The SEC filing said: “As part of management's assessment of the Company's internal controls, management identified material weaknesses in the Company's internal controls related to internal loan review, resulting from ineffective oversight, risk assessment and monitoring activities.” Woof.

Oh, and the bank said its losses were actually $2.4B more in Q4 than expected thanks to a massive impairment charge. It also asked for extra time on its test annual report.

Pull the Band-Aid

It appears that an overpriced consultant advised the bank to hit investors with all of its bad news at one time. In addition to the Q4 commentary, NYCB shook up its leadership. To which everyone responded, what took so long?

Alessandro DiNello, the current exec chairman, will take over as CEO. And Marshall Lux will be promoted to presiding director of the board. It just so happens that he previously headed up risk management at JPMorgan Chase’s consumer bank. That, ladies and gentlemen, is called good optics.

STB

+ Sam Bankman-Fried reportedly gives crypto tips to Brooklyn jail guards — here’s his top pick (Read)

+ Amid mass layoffs, it’s best to take a new approach to job searches, expert says (Read)

~ ICYMI... Mark Cuban still follows this advice his dad gave him at age 14: It helps me live ‘the way I wanted to’ (Read)

TS

+ “It could have been worse.” - what investors had to say about the PCE print (and probably what your S.O. thinks following 2.5 minutes of lovemaking)

The core Personal Consumption Expenditures index (read: inflation) rose 0.4% month over month and 2.8% vs. a year ago. The good news is that was in line with expectations.

The bad news is that December’s print showed 0.1% and 2.9%, respectively.

Probably the worst news (or best if you’re a living, breathing human) is that personal income rose 1% in January. Economists were expecting just 0.3%. Just a bit outside.

Why should I care? You know how logistics companies complain about the clusterf*ck that is last-mile delivery? Well, the last mile of inflation is very likely going to be a b*tch. It’s already proving to be “lumpy.” And anything short of inflation dropping consistently could keep the Fed from cutting rates.

+ I bet Gateway is punching air right now…

Dell (+19.3% after hours) is out here getting its 2007 on. And it’s all thanks to (what else?) artificial intelligence.

Sure, Dell reported a beat on the top and bottom lines. But revenue actually dropped 11% vs. the same period last year.

Dell’s infrastructure group (spoiler: that’s where the AI P&L lives) even fell year over year. But it did manage to climb 10% vs. the previous quarter.

So why the bump?

Because of its prospects in the AI server space. I’ll just leave this quote from Dell’s COO right here: “Our strong AI-optimized server momentum continues, with orders increasing nearly 40% sequentially and backlog nearly doubling, exiting our fiscal year at $2.9 billion.”

+ It’s a good thing Sam Altman is going to secure the bag as Reddit’s 3rd largest shareholder when the social media company IPOs. Because he’s going to need to secure a good lawyer…

The Shortseller Enrichment Commission is opening an investigation into whether Sam Altman and OpenAI misled investors. Specifically, those snitches want to see the communications that led to Sam’s firing and subsequent rehiring.

+ Bad news, fin-bros… AI can use Excel without the mouse too.

Microsoft (+1.4% after hours) just launched an AI chatbot for finance professionals called Copilot for Finance.

And the Copilot’s capabilities sound like a job description for literally every finance job ever. It can analyze corporate data, effectively search yuge data sets, and streamline audits.

For f*ck’s sake it can even generate PowerPoint presentations and write emails based on Excel data… and (presumably) some illegible notes from your MD.

The product is still in public beta mode, so we don’t have an MSRP. But considering Copilot for 365 costs $30 per month, this option is a whole lot cheaper than some first-year analyst.

FWD

Here's what I'm keeping an eye on today...

+ Plug Power and FuboTV report

EXIT

Yesterday I asked, “Are you team ‘breakfast for dinner’?”

47.9% of you think it’s a nice little treat a few times a year. I couldn’t agree more.

Here’s today’s question…

The AI wars are escalating quickly. So…

What's your go-to AI chatbot?

Login or Subscribe to participate in polls.

Oh, and one more thing…

What did you think about today's newsletter?

Login or Subscribe to participate in polls.

Want to advertise in The Water Coolest? Fill out this form and I’ll be in touch.

Looking to work with the best newsletter consultant in the game? Let’s talk.

FINE

Does this look like the face of a guy you should take financial advice from?

No, it’s the face of an individual who is financially irresponsible/dumb enough to be talked into spending money on a family photo shoot that he could have just done with his iPhone. So, act accordingly...

This is not financial advice. Nothing in this newsletter is an investment recommendation. All content is created for entertainment, educational, or informational purposes only. Do your own research, or do yourself a favor and hire a professional